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It turns out that the world is really gullible and you can actually con someone into giving you a job even if you are totally useless and possess no additional talents other than passing gas.

I have been shouting it from rooftops that i am no longer jobless and that i have a life(yeah right!). But for all the imbeciles who are not sure whether it’s reality or a dream and are not confident that they actually have a job, here’s a list of 10 things that will make you confident that you really do work( though this in no way means that you will work long enough, i mean if you read the list to confirm what you think you know, how dumb can you get?)

So here goes. You know that you have a job when –

10. You feel totally worthless and your already low self esteem takes a further beating when you figure out that you can’t figure out why they hired you.

9. You start getting backaches from sleeping in your chair even though you are hardly even 25

8. You have weekends off and can’t figure out things to keep yourself busy

7. You be nice to people even though they are total crap and you wouldn’t look at them twice outside of your office

6. You look forward to the 1st/2nd of every month as if it’s Christmas Day.

5. Casual flirting could be grounds for sexual harassment. Then again if you flirt with girls who don’t really understand the term “lets go out sometime”, it is bound to get you in trouble.

4. The office hottie doesn’t know you exist. This actually is a universal law applicable to colleges, schools, localities, bars, gyms, supermarkets…you get the picture

3. You get paid for work that a dyslexic monkey could do. And feel proud of it!

2. You find that one person to hang out with even though you don’t have much to talk about because you would not like to come across as a lonely freak.

1. Potential girls you could like, don’t disappear off the face of the earth

So there you have it. A guidepost to get you through the dark times when you brain doesn’t seem to work. Please let me be clear that this list has in no way been derived from my own experience. I love my office and the people are, who I can hang out with. And point 4 doesn’t really apply to me. Not that she know exactly who I am,what my favourite music is and so on. But the fact that there is no office “hottie”!!


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